Sunday, February 1, 2009

All or Nothing

I have gained most of my weight back with my all or nothing way of being. I am eating sugar like it is the last granule I will ever consume. It is just crazy! I just have a block with this whole deal. Thank you to Pubsgal and Miz Fit who are not ready to give up on me. I am not going to give up. I am just in a quandary...I know that I can't tolerate sugar for two important reasons:
1. It is deadly for my PCOS and shuts down my endocrine system
2. I have a serious addiction to sugar and can't control myself, not unlike an alcoholic.

So, my question is...do I start the no sugar at all way of eating again, or do I use it in moderation? I don't seem to be able to use it in moderation. If I feel deprived, then it spirals down to deprivation prevention.

In this time of upheaval, I have been consulting my recipe books, journaling, making a work book and stocking up on really delicious, healthy food. My new approach is to eat very delicious food that is exceptionally healthy. Eating healthy. Nothing more, except exercise. Still working it all out.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a great post, and I admire your good decision-making! Good luck keeps going. Dieting is hard, weight loss is harder, but one can do it if determine. Some great info you have here http://www.empowereddoctor.com/weight-loss4

WWSuzi said...

I have to tell you i went through the same thing not too long ago! For me i have to stay away from it. From experience if i decided to have a cookie for some reason it triggers something in me and a monster comes out and all i want is sugar and carbs and it can go on for days or weeks! So for me i need to stay as far away as possible! I know to some this doesn't sound normal and some people can eat it in moderation, just not me!

WWSuzi said...

Sorry i also meant to say i haven't felt so good in a long time and i am truly enjoying what i do eat now :)

debby said...

For me, Joy, it was a gradual weaning down. I don't think I could have started if I had told myself "no more ____" or "never again ______." Even now, 4 years into it, I continue to refine my food choices. Choosing sugar-free the grand majority of the time. But if I was to say, no more sugar, ever again, to myself, I think I might still rebel. So it is more of a meal by meal choice thing. I don't say never again, but for this meal I choose the sugar free choice. Does that make any sense?

Pubsgal said...

Hi Joy! I'm so glad you're hanging in there.

Everyone has a different catalyst for change, and a different way to go about it. What made me have to change was facing up to my diagnosis *right now*. I didn't want to spend my future as a person with diabetes blind or as an amputee. When I was "only" morbidly obese, the consequences of my actions seemed somewhere "out there" in the future. So given my urgent circumstances, I probably tried to do things a lot more strictly than I otherwise would have. Now that I've achieved better control of my diabetes numbers, I have different challenges, but more like the traditional weight loss ones: walking the fine line to figure how much dark chocolate is "a-OK" vs. "spike!", how to gauge whether having half a cookie will help me avoid feeling deprived vs. trigger a binge on non-spiking yet caloric foods, such as nuts. (I feel like I've gotten pretty good about treats not triggering desire for MORE treats...mainly through fear of the consequences of bad diabetic control. I was never inherently good at moderation ;-)

Vee said...

Is sugar the trigger, or things it's put together with? Can you have stevia and be ok? Or honey? Did you know that white sugar is one molecule different than heroine in its chemical composite? Sugar is addictive for many reasons!

I have troubles with sugar compulsion too. That's why Hubby has to hide my dark chocolate Hershey bars. Once I start eating, I can't stop. I have the same ovarian problem, and more. I have certain triggers, and sometimes I conveniently forget them just so I can have that particular food. Unbelievable that I choose pain and food over pain-free deprivation.

Mind over matter. At least, that's what I tell myself. Vee at www.veegettinghealthy.blogspot.com