Day 1 Without Sugar

At 2:46 exactly, the headache started!! Yea! It is working. My former sugar buddy is ticked that we are not a team anymore. I was at a stop light and happened to look at the clock and the next minute, the headache started and got stronger. BRING IT ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really am focused on a new way to nurture. I started the day off with Yoga. I could only do a small part because of my knees (I fell on cat barf that I could not see, in the garage) that were still bruised. Yoga felt really good. Each day, I will do more and more. I had plenty of really good, tasty sugar free things around. I even was mindful of my taco. All taco seasoning has hidden sugar, so I made my own! It was really delish! I followed my plan exactly (except for the part about getting to bed at 10:00)-that will have to come in a week or two. I am shooting for 11:00 so I better run. Tomorrow and the next day will have KILLER headaches. Go me!

Preparation S

Monday is the day I give up sugar (at least until Christmas Eve and Christmas Day). As you know, I have been preparing for this undertaking. I finally made peace with the fact that I do not "do" sugar like most people and it does not "do" me like it does other people. Sugar took my fertility. That alone should be reason enough to dump this "so called friend." My PCOS is largely related to sugar and is a vicious cycle.

I am finally in the acceptance stage that I can no longer fool myself that sugar can be in my life. I have taken several days to research the best way to remove it. I have read books, blogs and really though about what to do. Two excellent resources were a blog called: My Sugar Shock Story http://www.vanadia.com/stopbeingsweet/about/ and an amazing blog devoted to thinking about our personal balance called http://www.firstourselves.com/ Karly Randolph Pitman wrote the best ibook called Overcoming Sugar Addiction. Every paragraph had something important to say. I feel like now I have a good idea about what to do to finally get a grip about how I want to live the rest of my life. I started to remove sugar from the house. I just tossed it all in the trash! Then I went to Whole Foods to get some really great non sugar foods that are healthy. I had a farewell sugar cavalcade today. I really didn't even like it. I was shoveling in sugar for the sake of shoveling in sugar on my last day. Not very satisfying at all. I can't wait to start this. If you have read my blog, this is a huge step. I have made a very detailed plan of my day to include snacks and exercise/yoga. Speaking of Yoga, I got a DVD of "Yoga Just My Size" and it seems great. I really want to do Yoga but was always too out of shape to even attempt it. Yoga is just one aspect of my new nuturing ways. I bought a great salt scrub and will make two massage appointments. One massage after the first seven days and then after 21 days. I have water aerobics scheduled for next week. I will let you know how all of this goes!

Deep Down, I Know What I Have To Do!

I have been messing around and really not done a good job on WW at all. It is for one simple reason, I CANNOT MANAGE MY SUGAR! I keep telling myself that I will get back on the wagon. I will do better with points. The bottom line is that unless I eliminate sugar, I will always battle the addiction. It will always sabotage my success. During the last few days, I have been doing a lot of reading about how to remove sugar from my diet. There are lots of ideas out there. I have found two very interesting points of view that I am investigating. I know that right now, even a little bit of sugar makes me nutty. It has ruined my reproductive health (PCOS), and caused a huge weight gain. The truth is that sugar is not my friend. Unfortunately, it sure soothes me. My daughter just had a challenging time going to bed and was testing. What did I do, polish off ice cream. It calmed me down. Most normal folks don't abuse sugar the way I do. I need it after almost every meal. I had most of my junk out of the house and I was rummaging through my daughters old Halloween candy leftovers that nobody likes (including me), but it was a fix, in a pinch. I have gone off of sugar before cold turkey and it was HORRIBLE! This time, I have a plan. It is going to be filled with a different type of comfort. I am going to dedicate days to deal with the pain of it all. Summer is a perfect time to do this. I am aiming for Wednesday of next week. I will keep you posted with the details to follow.

Sugar Sabotage

I can't believe how I am binging. We did a tea party and got a few "Little Debbie" cakes that taste like wax and I am downing them! They are hideous! I continue to buy sugar at the store and hope that I will stay within my points, but have stopped even logging. I think I need a sugar intervention. I worry if I go off of sugar, I will rebel. I have to get a grip. I am not doing well at all!

Down Three...Up Two. Yikes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was down three pounds last week and gained two back. I have one pound loss for two weeks. For the last three days, I was completely off program and it is a miracle that I did not gain even more. What is my problem??????????????????????????????????????????????//

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

I was reading Lynn's blog about disappointment and how she just felt the feelings and did not eat through them. That is something that I struggle with from time to time. Today, I had a stressful mommy day and I simply went to my drug, food, to calm me. I did not over do it and still ate within my points, but it was deliberate. Had I just become calm and felt the irritation, I would have been better able soothe without food. That was the ugly. The "bad "was that I did not really plan well for my food today and am tempted to eat something late at night. I will try to work thorough that feeling. The good was that I made healthier food choices for dinner. I had spinach linguini with turkey spaghetti sauce, organic salad and whole grain bread. In the old days, I would have gone off the deep eating abiss because of the earlier stress of the day. I was pleased about that. My next goal is to clean out the excess in my cupboards. I don't know what is shoved behind food and I am not completely centered for planning. Keep you posted!

Back On Track!

So yesterday, I let it rip and ate all kinds of food way beyond my points. I did not even keep a journal of my food yesterday. My old pattern of behavior would have been to blow off the whole week since I am sure I have not points left. Instead, I followed the plan and got to work. I did my journal, walked and even had a Dairy Queen Blizzard in my plan. It was within my points (I don't think I will spend my points on that again-12 points for a small!) Since my goal is to lose only 6 lbs per month, I am not stressing out that I may gain this week because of my beach trip extravagance. I was also able to keep going on one of my ultimate goals, which is to eventually adopt more vegetarian way of eating. My mini goal is to eat vegetarian once a week. I made a veggie burger and really could not tell the difference. It was delicious on a whole grain bun. Tomorrow will be even better. I am going to do this!

A Loss, and Then Another Loss!

July 1st started my getting serious journey. I lost 3lbs the first week. The next day, I was up two and today, I ate like a maniac! What up with that? I have to figure this out!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am back on program tomorrow. I think I get thrown when I am out of my routine. I was at the beach all day and ate like I usually do on those fun summer beach trips. I still have a lot of time left this week (my weigh in is Tuesdays), so I will rally and pull it together. Keep ya posted!

Hunger!

Since I have gotten serious, I have felt hungry. I know that is not the most earth shattering news, but I have not really noticed before that I have not been hungry. I think at the slightest moment that I was uncomfortable, I would immediately eat. Now, I am planning better and eating less. I am going to be early and not eating late. I feel like I am on a roll now!

Finally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

July 1, 2008 begins the journey! I feel great about my food choices today and I followed the plan well. No fudging. Lynn and so many bloggers are my inspiration. I am almost there, believing that I can do this. I have kept my promise to myself regarding diet drinks and mochas. I don't even miss them now. When I get to 199 (onederland), I am going to treat myself to tennis lessons. When I get within 50 lbs of my goal of 129, I want to start the vegetarian transformation, as well as a sugar purge. I do a pretty good job with organics right now, so that is good. I want to do this slowly, without deprivation. My ultimate goal is to reach my goal on my 45th birthday. That way, I can average about 6lbs a month (which I think is workable) and also look forward to getting older. Yeah me! I am on my way to reaching and more importantly sustaining my goal weight. That for me will take a total transformation.