Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Doing the Limbo

I feel like I am in limboland. I am still off of sugar, but I am not being careful with the rest of my diet, like I ate way too much pizza for dinner tonight. What is up with that? I guess in a twisted way, I feel like I am entitled to eat other non sugar foods late at night, when I am not hungry, and to stuff my emotion, because I deserve it. Why do I deserve it? Well, because I am giving up so much. I have not eaten a morsel of chocolate for almost 60 days. That should count for something! I should be able to coast to my ultimate weightloss goal. I think I am in the bargaining stage. I am giving up _____ so I should only have to do ______. The prob is that it is just not working for me. I gained last week, I stayed the same this week and I am still over doing my fruit Larabars. I seemed to be eating three a day now. I am not very well planned with my food. I am not getting enough sleep so that I can plan out my stuff. If I get more than 5 hours of sleep a night, I would have the energy to get centered with food and home. I JUST DON'T WANT TO GO TO BED EARLY! What is my problem? I am tired. I should just go the hell to bed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If I went to bed, I would fall asleep instantly. I see the late night as yet another "reward," if you will, for what I am giving up. I need to get a clue. HELP my wise bloggers!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey, Joy, I hate to throw water on your pizza, but have you considered that there is a very good chance that your pizza dough or pizza sauce has sugar in it? Maybe the thought of that will keep you from eating so much pizza?

I hear ya about giving up a lot, though. But if you really want to lose weight, I'm afraid you'll have to give up a bit more. Some of the things you're eating are pretty high in the calorie range...

Pubsgal said...

You know, this seems to be a common thread lately among the weight loss and maintenance bloggers. I wonder if we have some weird primal thing going on in the fall, where we fatten up for winter? Except we don't get to sleep the whole time like bears do. Darn.

I've had to make a lot of drastic changes at once, but perhaps it's better to take it in stages, just like getting into exercise: you start with one thing, then add another as time goes on, and pretty soon the physical part is clicking.

I don't think you necessarily need to give up pizza, but maybe make some tweaks to it so that it has less sugar and carbs? I think Debby might have a point. Roni's GreenLiteBites web site has a lot of great recipes, and one of them is a pizza made on Lavosh. I use a whole grain low carb wrap as my crust and just a little bit of sauce. Lots of toppings, though! :-) For fast-food pizza, I might have a little bit of the end of the crust, but use a knife and fork to scrape the toppings off the rest. That way I feel like I'm still getting pizza, but not quite all the carbs.

I know what you mean about the bargaining stage. For me, the fat items--almonds, pistachios, marinated roasted veggies, bacon, charred fats on meat--have replaced the carbs as my food challenge. No, they won't spike my blood sugar, and some of them do have the good fats, but they still pack a lot of calories. We had some pizza show on the TV this morning, and there was this place in Chicago that made a dessert with chocolate chip cookie dough as the crust and then put ice cream on top...and my eyes teared up. Bleep! I just want to feel like I can eat like a normal person again without losing a limb or something.

I don't know if you've added any exercise, but perhaps you could ease into that? Take a small walk in the evening, or even just a few minutes of light cardio and a little bit of strength training, then add to it a little bit each week. I've gotten where I feel really cranky if I don't do it...like today, I was running behind, and I had the choice: 20 minute run or scrap it. I scraped it, and was feeling upset with myself, and my husband said, "Why? Are you afraid that taking a break one day will make you quit?" *Ding! Ding! Ding!* He got that one exactly right. I've decided to take a longer walk at lunch to make up for it, but I've felt sad all morning.

Geez, Joy, I feel like I've written a whole blog post here! :-) So if you see a similar entry over there, hope you don't mind...

FatGirl said...

Fall is always tough...there's so much good football on TV and it's so tempting to eat nachos or chips and queso while watching the games. Hopefully they'll show the games on the TVs at the gym so I can work out while watching football. It's a thought!

Lyn said...

Oh I am such a night owl too. I get the toddler to bed and help the other kids do homework and then I just want to enjoy the night. I want to sit here and read and surf the web and goof off because it is my only "peace" time. It's too late/quiet/dark to do dishes/housework/make phone calls/weed the yard, so I get to relax. When what I really need, like you, is to just go to freaking BED.

Lying in bed just seems like such a waste of good, quiet time though...

doesn't it??

But yeah, going to bed before 11-12 (and getting up at 5-6) is not working for me, either. We better get to bed earlier, eh??